Andrew is a bright, young attorney in our church. I’ve always thought he was really intelligent. While I wouldn’t hesitate to have Andrew represent me in court, I am pretty sure I would never go to him for marital advice.
Andrew is participating in B90 (Reading the Bible in 90 Days). He has come across some texts that have helped him understand how his marriage is supposed to work. God Help Him! This is the text I got from Allison. You will see what I mean:
So B90…sounds great right? Sounds like a time that we can deepen our relationship with God and one another. A time that we can truly gain more knowledge and understanding that ultimately builds our faith and takes it to a whole new level. Well, I guess he’s taken a new hobby of finding where the Bible talks about honoring your husband. This is where I have you to blame.
He must have seen Ephesians 5:33 “However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
However, I feel like his most favorite quote is now Ephesians 5:22-5:24 “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.”
He head was so big at that point that he must have skipped right over Ephesians 5:25-33 “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her hat he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church.”
I feel a devotional coming on….”
I responded, “Yep.”
While I am certain, once the violence is over, Andrew and Allison are going to be just fine, there are many people with a very skewed view of how a husband and wife are to relate to one another. Some truly believe wives are to be subservient. In order to bolster this point of view, they pick and choose the scripture passages they agree with and ignore those they don’t.
But in looking at how God ordained a couple to relate to one another, it is important to understand God’s intention in making both man and woman.
At the dawn of history, when God created the universe and everything in it, God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper as his partner.” (Genesis 2:18)
Notice it doesn’t say, “Junior Partner.” God’s word is “Partner.” This means equal.
So, know if you are married, the one who took the vows to love and cherish you till death, is your equal. That’s a good thing.
Prayer: Dear Gracious Heavenly God, thank you for the joy, laughter, and peace, I find in your Holy Word. Help me live my life grounded in scripture. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.
Just for the record, there are two more lessons I got from Allison’s text.
First, Andrew needs to remember not everything that crosses his mind should come out his mouth. This is a lesson I have learned after decades of marriage. I have the scars and the limp to prove it. This is why the wisest of all people said: “Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut, and you will stay out of trouble.“ (Proverbs 21:23 NLT)
Second, Shannon needs to learn that I am her equal. In fact, even though it is still too early for most sane people to be up, I am going to march into the bedroom, wake Shannon up, and tell her I will no longer be subservient because the Bible says I am her partner. I think she will be very appreciative.
You should probably pray for Andrew and me. It might be a very long day for both of us.
I pray your day is filled with joy and laughter.
Tom Robbins